A confession...

Perception verses truth in a world of supposition. An introspective.

It’s time for a small confession as I discover amidst close friends, that there is a perception that all is thriving and together. I was challenged, or perhaps more truthfully, encouraged by this wonderful statement from the legendary minimalist composer Terry Riley, who turns 90 this year:

“If you know what you’re doing in the arts, then you’re doing it wrong. That’s a pretty good maxim. If you don’t know what you’re doing, you’re on the right track because you’re open to the whole world of possibilities.”

My confession is that in many ways, I’m quite lost and struggling to make sense of the Mosses album. This may have more to do with recent dramatic and challenging life changes, relocating to a new home and studio, but it is also very much the way albums seem to evolve, for me at least.

Mynd-Moss Sketchbook, latest entry last week, June 2025.

There’s this odd middle phase in a creative project, where nothing appears to make sense, you can’t quite see the form and threads coming together. It isn’t that I can’t create or am experiencing writer’s block; if anything, the opposite is the problem. I find that I make a new piece of music (sketch form) every time I’m in the studio and can’t figure out how to pin the sketches to the vast array of field and biodata recordings yet. I guess I’m not at a place in the project where I am obsessing over exact ideas and harnessing all music creation to the overriding vision, BUT, I do catch myself thinking I should be.

Whixall Moss 31st March 2025.

There is comfort in Terry Riley’s comment above, and I find reassurance from my personal experience being here a few times before with a growing love for the unknown. I find that it leads to a place of true and meaningful creative exploration, trying to find the purpose and heart of the project. It’s not quick and straightforward, but a lengthy pilgrimage, like hunting for gold. The journey towards a reinfication of different streams of biological life in an artistic form is both beautiful and perplexing.

As you can see in the first sketchbook photo above, I do have a working idea for the shape: Four pieces that portray the different seasons on the mosses as a suitable and definable framework. This appears to make the most sense with the changes acting upon this landscape’s flora and fauna through the seasons. I am also keen to fit the work within a tidy hour, meaning each piece would be around 15 minutes each, but all this could change as the project develops.

Yesterday’s “quick write it down before you leave and forget” entry.

I’m constantly thinking about how to communicate this landscape authentically, using both found sounds on the mosses and created sounds in the studio. This becomes more challenging with journeying between my home, the studio, and the mosses, nearly a 70-mile round trip, with days or weeks between studio and moss. I do see this as a potential positive that will cause the album to evolve differently from Mynd; slower, adopting new processes such as using projections of my images from the mosses on a large screen in the studio, and lengthy periods of just listening to field recordings to transport myself back there.

The above clip is a live recording of an accordion loop upon arrival at the studio yesterday.

The problem or potential positive journey is where to include pure field recordings amongst compositions, and where to adapt these or use more abstract gatherings of sounds that have had the human touch. There is an unknown question of when there have been enough visits, recordings, and experiences of the moss landscape to fully know this place enough to paint its portrait in sound. I’ll only know when I know, but I assume another year is needed. Ofcourse, there are always the larger existential questions of: Why bother? What is it for? How can this be helpful or add anything to the world? But these thoughts are quietened with the life-fufilling experience of making some impromptu new loop upon entering the studio and spending a few hours exploring, then building sounds on top of it, finding myself again.

Above is a rough sketch made yesterday. If it sticks, it’ll be re-recorded in a studio and it will include field/Biodata recordings during Autumn on the mosses.

Although I’ve confessed that I’m lost, I believe this is where I need to be, to wrestle something meaningful into being from the mosses project. It has to matter and does matter, which must be why I’m worried and am way overthinking it all!

I leave you with a sketch from yesterday above. When I arrived at the studio, I immediately picked up an accordion to make a loop just as a background soundscape, but as usual, it soon became the foundation for another idea. The above is a very rough sketch of an idea for “autumn / Hydref ii.”

Thanks for listening. Please feel free to add any comments or precious wisdom on this below!